Things Today That Suck

I'm actually having a kind of good day. Went book shopping with Mommy, found a St. Ives clay mask that's supposed to firm my skin, got all my vacuuming done. All good things. There are some things that are bugging me, though.

1. Money

2. Textbooks

3. No textbooks. Even though the class is starting in a matter of days.

4. Cars that leak and have standing water in the back.

5. Crazy confusing bank statements that need to be figured out prior to buying (or not buying) textbooks. Refund from Qdoba wtf? I know I'm a good customer but...

6. Real estate developers.Yes, today I am all-encompassing in my hate.

7. The stairmaster that broke, forcing my brother to run up and down the basement stairs over and over and over again Rocky-style until I'm ready to wait at the top and shove him down. Kidding. Maybe.

8. Crazy mothers.

9. Crazy boyfriends.

10. Not being able to tell if your best friend is being plagued mostly by a crazy mother or a crazy boyfriend.

11. Having to drive an hour one way in order to pick up said best friend to find out the answer to #10.

12. The logistical impossibility of #11 due to #4.

13. Pharmacy technicians not being able to give me Advil without the care of the absent pharamacist.. Um. It's not *actually* meth yet. If I could figure out how to turn Advil Cold and Sinus into meth do you think I'd be a history major shopping at Target??? I have a headache. And I'm here with my $7.99 wanting Advil. Why do you have to wait for a pharmacist to give it to me???

14. No one donating books while I'm working at the register. *woe*

15. $40 for season one of Ugly Betty? WTF?

16. Running out of garbage bags fifteen minutes after I got home from the second trip to Target in one day.

*le sigh*

But all is okay, now, because I have another lolcat.

Reflections on Recent Vacations (or Why I Won't Be Having Sex on My Honeymoon)

We've been home for a couple of days, and I've been sleeping alone for five blessed nights, as opposed to being shoved into a glorified twin bed with a full-grown person.

It's not even so much the other person part that bugs me I mean, it's uncomfortable, but sh's my sister, so at least I'm used to her filth. (Kidding. She bathes almost every day.)

And it's not that we don't always stay at nice places, because we really have stayed at several very nice hotels, and they all suck.

No, it's the fact that OTHER PEOPLE HAVE SLEPT AND SWEATED AND DROOLED AND DONE GOD KNOWS WHAT ELSE THERE AND YOU EXPECT ME TO FALL ASLEEP!?!?!?

Mostly that.

See, I'm a total bed whore. I have a huge comfy, cushy, CLEAN bed with nice, cool, CLEAN sheets at home. I love it. More than anything or anyone else in the house, really.

(Okay, maybe not this computer. I love this computer.)

I need to snuggle to sleep. I need to have the little blanket thingy over my head and preferably mouth, something that's hard to accomplish when you're trying to avoid someone else's drool spot. And you can't snuggle when the scary Blanket of Unidentifiable Fabric is folded down by my waist, in an effort to have it not touch any part of me.

I'd sleep on top of it if I didn't keep the hotel room at a bracing 58 degrees in a passive-aggresive power play with my landlords parents who prefer to keep the house at a balmy, Miami Beach-like tempreature that starts with an 8.

Ooh, and I like to shove my toes down into the corners where the sheets are tucked under, and hang my hand over the edge of the bed. Problem #1: God knows what kind of bugs live in the sheets down there. Problem #2: There could be a body underneath the bed that I might inadvertantly touch.

So, as of last weekend, I have decided that honeymoons and all their bed-centric activities would simply not be happening if I'm worried about dead bodies, bed bugs, and what the hell kind of fiber makes this blanket???, so I'm not having sex on my honeymoon.

Just thought you'd all like to know.

My entire family is going out to dinner tonight, and even though I said I'd be okay with that I'm little bit pissed that they listened to me.

So I'm making them bring me a sandwich. Because I will be hungry and annoyed when I return at ten-thirty, and then I may be forced to be baking brownies until the wee hours of the morning.

So there.

I give you- the Funniest. Lolcat. Ever.

Hehe. It's funny 'cuz it's French.